There's a fine balance between ways to make friends and ways to make a nuisance out of yourself, and I think you've done a good job of differentiating them. Most fannish posts and comments on LJ are not for the benefit of the poster, but for the recipient(s) and other readers. Writing for yourself on your own journal is your own business, but stuff you want other people to read, like fics and posts to comms, is a whole other can of worms.
If I may add one thing, I'd like to suggest that it's a good idea to give a nod to the rules/etiquette when posting to comms. Mention that you used the tags to look for similar posts before asking a question, for example, or use a comm's standard fic header. Even if you've done days of research before posting, not communicating that you know what you're doing will often leave people unsure how to react to you (or help you, as the case may be), and that will just discourage feedback/interaction, which nobody wants.
Also, even if you're just trying to be respectful, prefacing posts/comments with something like "I hope this is ok," will only make people think you didn't bother checking the rules first. If it's ok, just do it. If it's not ok, no preface will change that.
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There's a fine balance between ways to make friends and ways to make a nuisance out of yourself, and I think you've done a good job of differentiating them. Most fannish posts and comments on LJ are not for the benefit of the poster, but for the recipient(s) and other readers. Writing for yourself on your own journal is your own business, but stuff you want other people to read, like fics and posts to comms, is a whole other can of worms.
If I may add one thing, I'd like to suggest that it's a good idea to give a nod to the rules/etiquette when posting to comms. Mention that you used the tags to look for similar posts before asking a question, for example, or use a comm's standard fic header. Even if you've done days of research before posting, not communicating that you know what you're doing will often leave people unsure how to react to you (or help you, as the case may be), and that will just discourage feedback/interaction, which nobody wants.
Also, even if you're just trying to be respectful, prefacing posts/comments with something like "I hope this is ok," will only make people think you didn't bother checking the rules first. If it's ok, just do it. If it's not ok, no preface will change that.